Up Close with Upward: Unhappy in Birmingham
Dear Upward, I read all the time about sexless marriages, and I am wondering--how can I get one of those? I'm a 40-year-old woman, married, two kids, working full-time. My husband and I were deeply in love, but life is now an endless cycle of stress and busyness. He works hard at his job, but at home, I feel like I’m doing everything. I repeatedly ask for help with household tasks, only for him to complain or do a mediocre job. As I’m finally winding down for the night, he often tries to initiate sex. I’ve asked him to stop doing this, but he still does, and I usually end up having sex with him to keep the peace. But I'm truly not into it with him anymore. Most nights, I want to get sex over with so I can have some time to myself before I fall asleep. I don’t want to leave my husband and disrupt our children’s lives, but I’m unhappy. My husband is unlikely to change, at least not without a lot of complaining and conflict. What should I do? Sincerely, Unhappy in Birmingham